New Poll Shows Trump Losing to Hunter Biden
In the most ominous news for the President, if the former Vice-President’s son were somehow prosecuted, convicted, and locked up, voters would still choose him over Trump by a double-digit margin.
Fauci Admits He Does Not Have Brain Like Trump’s
“I have to say that he has a point,” Fauci said. “My brain could never come up with the things his brain comes up with.”
October 20, 2020
Trump Accuses New Zealand’s Prime Minister of Competently Handling the Coronavirus to Get Re?lected
Trump called Jacinda Ardern’s use of public-health measures to mitigate the pandemic’s impact “a sleazy political move like you wouldn’t believe.”
October 18, 2020
NBC Cancels Reboot of “The Apprentice” After One Episode
Puzzlingly, the producers tinkered with the original’s winning format, transforming its star from a nearly omniscient business mogul to a hapless incompetent beset by failure.
October 16, 2020
Amy Coney Barrett Refuses to Tell Brett Kavanaugh Which Beer She Prefers in Supreme Court Fridge
“It’s not like I was asking her about some dumb legal case,” Kavanaugh said. “This is important. This is beer.”
October 15, 2020
Susan Collins Concerned That Amy Coney Barrett Too Indecisive
The Senator from Maine said that Barrett’s dithering verged on being “annoying and even aggravating.”
October 14, 2020
Trump Confident He Will Defeat Hillary Clinton
“A lot of people don’t think I will beat Hillary, but they should prepare to be wrong,” the President said.
October 13, 2020
Amy Coney Barrett Supports Health Care Available in Year Constitution Was Written
“The best cure for headaches, fevers, and agues is arsenic,” she said.
October 12, 2020
Ivanka Trump Applies for Job as Biden’s Daughter
Trump appeared to have difficulty finding tangible achievements to include on her application, other than “Did not write a tell-all book.”
October 10, 2020
Ben Carson Wondering Where Everyone at White House Has Gone
The H.U.D. Secretary was also trying to make sense of the presence of cleaning crews throughout the building, but “couldn’t figure it out.”
October 8, 2020